South

Greetings,

We have been home for awhile now and things are getting back to normal, Well, that's not exactly the truth because the truth be told; I have very little idea what our normal is now. Katherine has been driving us many miles for doctor's appointments, dentists appointments and more. Lots of them are in relation to my stroke. I'm pretty frustrated with the whole scene, no answers to the questions I have about my future like what caused my stroke and what can I do to assure I don't have another one. There are 800,000 strokes every year in the U.S. and about 200,000 have second strokes and some have more. Now the neurologist tells me I have had multiple strokes but of course I was only aware of one on May 25th, six months ago today. She had me on a heart monitor for two weeks and I have an appointment for a "sleep consult"whatever that means. Apparently these are two things that could contribute to strokes. No results yet.The waiting to hear something definite wears on me.

When we moved way South, down here to the outback of Rio Rico we of course I had no way of knowing the stroke was going to be in my future. It has led to  huge and expensive lifestyle since doctors, physical therapists and everything is a long drive away. The gas prices haven't helped either. Now the bottom line is wait and see what happens and what we decide to do. Our lease runs through April then we will either need to extend it if possible or perhaps move somewhere more convenient.

Not knowing how long one will live is not anything new, we've all known we won't live forever but I'm almost 83 years old which probably makes it a bit more imminent than in the past and there is the stroke as well. For me, a person who has always been searching for answers it leaves me with the task of determining what I want to do with my days, weeks or months I have left. Okay, maybe even years. No one can know for sure. Do I just go on writing here and elsewhere, or come up with new ideas to make my life more valuable to others and thus myself? This is an area I am spending a lot of time thinking about, reading about and hopefully I will find an answer or two or at least more questions.

Thanks for reading,

Stan the Man