Acceptance has Mind-Boggling Results

Christmas is a good time to return to the subject of values. This blog has touched on values at several junctures. Why do values have a place on a blog about mind-boggling phenomena? Well, my experience working with clients throughout my 40+ year career as a therapist has taught me that those individuals and families with clear values and who use their values as sign posts for their behavior do better over the long haul. The results may be mind-boggling. Even with clear values we will continue to get off track. Values provide our sign-posts for getting back on track. A lack of clear values will make our lives more of a struggle.

The first five values that appear critical to me (perhaps you have others) are peacefulness, attentiveness, contribution, resilience and acceptance. Currently, at Christmas it seems that acceptance is particularly important to think about. What does acceptance means?

Acceptance means embracing all cultures, religions and lifestyles and working to reduce the boundaries between such entities. After all, we do all have commonalities. We all are human and we all live on this Earth. Because a country or culture lives differently or a religion believes differently should not mean we have to set out to reject or change them.

Acceptance means we understand everyone is doing the best they are able to in their present conditions. Individuals and cultures have obstacles to overcome that are unique to them. We need to have an understanding attitude towards others and their struggles. Acceptance means we have positive regard for others. It also means we make an effort to see the strengths of others rather than just their weaknesses.

Finally, acceptance of others is much more difficult if we don’t accept ourselves. We need to accept our own strengths and weaknesses and know we are doing the best we can at any given time. Perhaps acceptance of our own mortality is part of this. It is, after all, our ultimate weakness.

Diametrically opposed to acceptance are rejection, close-mindedness and bigotry. If we are able to move away from those characteristics and behaviors and toward the value of acceptance the results can be mind-boggling. To make a few steps in that direction we gave our money to Habitat for Humanity http://www.habitat.org/ this year instead of spending it on un-needed and unwanted gifts. One small thing but hopefully it will make a difference.

Stan the Man