Mind-Boggling Bookstore Venture

Laptop problems and broken eye glasses nearly halted my writing for a couple weeks but I’m now back and writing from San Francisco. I had been warned about the weather in the Bay Area. Cold, windy and foggy, they said. Not so far. The weather has been pretty much nice or at least acceptable compared to winter in New York City. The weather has allowed for exploration of the southwest corner of the city on foot. Necessary since I lack an automobile. To begin with, I discovered a bookstore, which is something I’m always trying to find in my new neighborhood.

This bookstore, humorous and a little odd, is indication of a business man with a creative mind. It is called ODE Bookstore. A large sign over the front door makes this announcement. The name comes from simply removing a B, R, another R and an S. If you haven’t figured it out the sign used to say BORDERS. This is one of the infamous stores closed when the chain went bankrupt. The new name also indicates to me that it is an ode to books. Yes, real books. Apparently the owner of ODE bought about 40,000 of the remaining books after Borders disappeared. According to the New York Times the cost to the new owner was $50,000. He leased the 35,000 square foot store and is selling the books at huge discounts. Yes, the books tend to be a little out of date and you will need to search but there are great bargains. According to the retail staff the owner plans to buy books from other sources to keep the independent bookstore supplied.

The location seems ideal, adjacent to San Francisco State University, a busy Trader Joe’s and the Stonestreet Mall.

My drop-in visit to the ODE Bookstore resulted in the purchase of two books. Two books I was specifically looking for by two of my favorite authors: Charming Billy by Alice McDermott and If the River Was Whiskey by TC Boyle. The listed prices on the books totaled $28. My actual purchase price was $7.00. I am not complaining. An independent bookstore to replace a failing (apparently) chain store that can sell books of quality for prices like that will continue to get my business. Yeah, it’s not fancy and doesn’t have high priced coffee but what do I care? Hope the ODE to books not only survives but thrives.

Stan the Man    

New York to San Francisco: Mind-Boggling

Our latest transition brings immense change. It is absolutely mind-boggling. Here we are in San Francisco. It is a city in which I have never thought about living. Likewise, it had never entered my mind to live in New York City which we just left a week ago after living there almost three years. I haven’t seen much or experienced much of San Francisco yet but my initial impression is that it is considerably different that New York. Of course, there is only one New York City and one Manhattan in that city.

In comparing San Francisco and New York City statistically we find New York has a population of 8.1 million living in a land area of 302 square miles. This means there are 27,016 New Yorkers living in every square mile. That’s crowded in my book and it felt that way. Meanwhile in San Francisco the population is 805,235 and San Franciscans live in only 46 square miles for a per square mile population of 17,169. It still sounds crowded to me. Actually, these two cities rank first and second in the U.S. in terms of density of population. San Francisco’s physical size is one of the smallest of the larger cities.

The climates of the two cities are decidedly different. New York receives an average of 50 inches of precipitation each year while San Francisco gets only 20 inches. New York’s winters, as I can attest, can be long, cold and snowy. Granted, they haven’t been this year but the last two winters saw single snowfalls of over 20 inches with frigid temperatures.

San Francisco has a reputation of being cold. This has not been true upon our arrival. It has been sunny and around sixty degrees. Of course that isn’t Florida where it is in the 80s but it does allow one to be outside to see the flowers in bloom and the majestic green trees. The trees in New York are currently naked of leaves appearing as dark skeletons against the gray sky. Here I haven’t yet seen a tree without leaves or needles and many shrubs are in bloom. This is early February. We’ve only had a brief glimpse of the famous San Francisco fog. Of course, we haven’t been here a week yet. We have much more to learn and see in the Bay Area.

Of course anyone who follows football will know that the Super Bowl is this coming Sunday. The New York Giants got to the Super Bowl by beating the beloved San Francisco 49ers with a last second field goal. I don’t think anyone in the Bay Area will be rooting for the hated Giants on Sunday.

There will be much more to write about as this latest mind-boggling transition develops.

Stan the Man Baxter        

MInd-boggling change!

I’m searching through my mind attempting to find a recollection of where I might have put the utility bill. I don’t need the bill, just the account number. The digital clock beside the bed says 3:15 AM. Suddenly it comes to me. The needed document must be in the “recently paid bills” file in the four drawer file cabinet. I file that tidbit away in my memory until morning and return to my dreams. Three hours later I’m awake and head directly to the file cabinet. Wait a minute, where is the file cabinet? It has disappeared and with it the much needed document.

The next order of business is to get the morning coffee brewed. In the kitchen I find the same puzzling situation. The coffee maker is gone. It has disappeared along with the file cabinet. Oh well, no coffee maker. There is a coffee shop downstairs. I go down and get a cup of java to drink while I watch “Morning Joe” my favorite morning show on MSNBC. As I walk by the concierge’s desk in the lobby she speaks to me in Spanish. The daytime concierge is from the Dominican Republic and we often have brief exchanges in Spanish. I know she said “buenas dias, como estas esta manana” but she also used a word I didn’t recognize. Back upstairs I reach for the Spanish dictionary to translate her word. My hand grasps nothing but empty space. The dictionary is gone. Oh well, it’s time for Morning Joe. I begin a search for the TV remote. It is nowhere to be found. 

My brain is apparently a little slow capturing the fact that we are in once again in transition. That is we are moving once again. The movers came yesterday and only left a small table and chairs, and a mattress along with Katherine and I. Even with that knowledge my habits persist, expecting things that are gone to be in their familiar places. This is another example of how difficult transitions can be. They essentially disrupt ones equilibrium. It can take some time for the changes to sink in and allow new brain patterns to take over. It is mind-boggling how disconcerting change can be.

We have had many transitions. I don’t know how often we’ve said “This will be the last time.” So far, that hasn’t occurred. Our furniture is on its way to our apartment in Bal Harbour, Florida. We will join it for only a brief time. Why make it simple?  Next we fly to San Francisco where Katherine has taken a new position for six months. Potentially we will spend 6 months in San Francisco in an apartment paid for by Katherine’s employer, return to Florida and rejoin our furniture and then settle down. Hah! We shall see.

Coming up soon will be our initial mind-boggling impressions of San Francisco, perhaps also some after-thoughts of New York City.

Stan the Man

New Year's Resolutions: Mind-boggling Potential

Most everyone I know, including myself, has areas of their lives they would like to change. When New Years comes around the traditional thing to do is make New Year’s Resolutions as an impetus to stimulate the change we desire. I know that we are a few days into the New Year, 2012. But some of you haven’t yet made resolutions for 2012. But it’s not too late. Others have made resolutions and have already become frustrated, overwhelmed and are backsliding.

In my own life and through my work with others I have discovered some principals that can radically improve your chances of experiencing success in changing aspects of your life through these first of the year resolutions. I share those with you below. The Change experienced can be mind-boggling.

 1. Write your resolutions down. Keep the written description of want you want to accomplish in a place where you will be confronted with it regularly. I have found that inside the top of my briefcase or on the first page of my journal work well. Some prefer a more public place like the refrigerator door or on the bathroom mirror.

2. Start by writing the reason you want the change. Most common resolution is to lose weight. Is that to be a good role model for your children or grandchildren or perhaps your employees? Then write that down. Or perhaps you want to be more attractive to the opposite or same gender. Write that down. Do be sure the reason is one you have passion for, one that is important to you. That is necessary to keep your motivational level high throughout the year. Be as specific as possible.

3. Set the goal. Write the number of pounds you want to lose or the increase you want to accomplish in income or whatever your desire might be. Be specific. Be realistic. Make it just a little beyond what you think you can achieve.

4. Now, after you have done steps 2 and 3 above, comes the most important aspect of being successful in reaching your goal. Write the specific things you will need to do to accomplish the goal. For example If you want to lose 20 pounds you will have to work out 5 times a week for 45 minutes at the gym or run 5 miles every day. You may also need to drink one beer a week instead of ten or be sure to eat only salad three times per week. If you want to increase your income you may need to take a class, read certain materials, take on new projects or apply for a higher paying job once per week/month. You will know what’s needed better than me. The important thing is to clearly identify the specific behaviors that are necessary to bring about the change you want. Again, specificity is critical. The more specific you are the more likely you are to do what is needed.

5. Unless you are superhuman you will not be able to change all spheres of your life at one time. Choose a priority or two and stick with those. Don’t overdo it. Five or ten resolutions to work on, at the same time, will probably mean doom for your resolution. Too many resolutions may well be overwhelming and it will be difficult to stay motivated.

6. Remember, there are always unanticipated results which are usually positive. Simply making a serious resolution for 2012 and having any amount of success will increase your self esteem. Your increased self esteem will, in turn, change your behavior in a positive direction. Watch for these results and congratulate yourself for the progress you have made in your life.

Happy New Year and I wish you success in 2012.

Stan the Man

Freud's Last Session

Sigmund Freud (1856-1939), the founder of psychoanalysis was born in Austria. He eventually fled to England. Freud has always been of considerable interest to me since much of my career I was a psychotherapist. I have a collection of many of his books translated into English before I was born. I do not subscribe to all of his concepts but acknowledge the foundation he created for much of what therapists do in the present day. Freud regarded God as an illusion based on the infantile emotional need for a powerful father/family.

C.S. Lewis (1898-1963) was born in Ireland and was writer and a professor at Cambridge. He is best known for his work The Chronicles of Narnia. He was an Atheist who one day had a revelation and converted to Christianity at age 33. He wrote much about his Christian beliefs in such books as Mere Christianity and the Four Loves. His books have sold millions of copies and continue to be read and loved to this day.

Playwright, Mark Germain wondered what a conversation between these two men would have been like. He speculates that the clash between the two would be classic. Apparently they never actually met but after Mark’s exhaustive research he speculated on the nature of interactions during a meeting between the two men. He transformed his speculations into a remarkable stage play which I was treated to for my recent birthday.

Of course, as one would expect, the primary subject on the play starring Mark Dold as Lewis and Martin Rayner as Freud, was Christianity versus Atheism. This led to a wide ranging spirited discussion between the two that embraced many related areas. The list of subjects that I gleaned from the 90 minute play included myths, suicide, war and its horror, politics, music, anti-Semitism, fear, trauma, facing pain and death, father’s love for daughter, homosexuality, sexual energy, the psychoanalyst’s couch and its role, humor and its role and intellectualism as an avoidance of emotion. I’m sure this isn’t an exhaustive list but hits the main topics.

Sitting in the first row of the New Worlds Stages on 50^th Street in Manhattan, we felt as if we were actually sitting in Freud’s office during an intimate, revealing and spirited discussion. One might expect that it could be dull but a combination of the script and the acting brought it alive and made it riveting. Freud was dying of mouth cancer at age 83 brought on by years of cigar smoking which he had not given up. Freud’s pain and his blood were graphic and Lewis, 41 at the time, attended to him with caring. 

It is not clear who won the debate regarding Christianity and Atheism. Neither convinced the other but it seemed as if they had respect for each other’s position at the end. I am reminded of an old Blood Sweat and Tears lyric: “I swear there ain’t no heaven and pray there ain’t no hell.”

A short time after their meeting, Freud took his own life with morphine provided by his doctor. C.S. Lewis went on to write his well known books. In spite of his popularity, his death on November 22, 1963 did not receive much attention. It was the same day that John F. Kennedy was killed.

Freud’s Last Session was slated to run 15 sessions. Due to its popularity it has now been performed more than 500 times and still going. Woody Allen had a session with Freud and of course one who really might need it, Alec Baldwin.

Stan the Man     

Mind-boggling Canstruction

On a recent weekend my youngest son Tim, who lives in Denver, visited New York City. In reality, he’s not so young anymore and he was celebrating another birthday. Are any of us so young anymore? At any rate he had two things he wanted to do while visiting, besides of course spending quality time with his dad and stepmom. Number one was to visit Ground Zero and the surrounding developments that have taken place there. This led us to the World Financial Center. It provides some great views of Ground Zero, the Memorial and the new towers going up. It was cold and Tim was wearing shorts which made the inside environment more comfortable.

In the common area of the World Financial Center we discovered a mind-boggling exhibit. Structures were on display that had been constructed entirely of canned food that would later go to the needy. They called it the Canstruction Exhibit. What the participating teams were able to accomplish was mind-boggling (see some at the right). I have to say my personal favorite is the replica of the Brooklyn Bridge. It is almost entirely constructed of cans of Spam. I love Spam. Yes I know, disgusting. I learned to enjoy it in Hawaii.

The second thing Tim wanted to do was to go to Times Square. We took the subway up there the next night. Times Square on a Saturday Night just before the holidays is a trip. We had an enjoyable evening with the other 10,000 people and ate ah nice dinner at an Irish Restaurant.

Overall a nice time, almost like a reunion with Tim.

Stan the Man

Mind-boggling Wildlife in the City

Fall grinds on into winter. Temperatures drop then rebound but only temporarily. It is a downward trend. We know what’s coming and it won’t be pretty unless you enjoy snow and ice. Leaves turn brilliant then let go and fall to the earth leaving bare branches braced for the first snowfall.

At the same time the wildlife is more active and makes its presence known. Yes, there is wildlife in Battery Park. Squirrels scurry about gathering their winter sustenance and begging for treats from tourists. Migrating ducks and geese stop to rest and forage. With Thanksgiving coming one would expect the turkeys to hide out. But no, with unabashed courage, at least one resident prances around the park providing photo ops for all.

Meanwhile up the street at Zuccotti Park the wildlife has become extinct through the actions of NYPD. Occupy Wall Street demonstrators were forcefully moved out at 1AM last night. There court order may help them recover. That remains to be seen. Oh, now I hear they are allowed back but without tents and sleeping bags. Brrrrrr!

I’m packing for my evacuation in a couple days. South Florida here I come. Eighty degrees and sunshine sounds delicious, especially on the beach. It will be a great environment for Thanksgiving.

Stan the Man